For the longest time, the latest style prevailing taste bandwagon configuration convention craze—fashion was my relish and thrill. I had no reason behind my attire, no purpose or true conviction with which I could lead certain objective. My clothes where mere entertainment with a closet as lavishly decorated blessed and whole could supply. No function, instead delight.
What life could I lead had I live for sheer entertainment? What kinds of value would I bring unto myself and how did it make me the humble modest quality I’ve dreamt of faithfully over the years?
Questions I found myself asking once sitting in class. I looked down only to see my body was expressed curve by peaceful curve although covered, I found my purpose in wearing my hijab (the covering) was unfounded; only to see my point had been missed, by my greatest audience, myself.
It was then did I appreciate the significance spoken and articulated through this hijab my body bears. While difficult to maintain, I shifted from patterns of my environment and closet to a hijab, which expresses no Eave’s curve, no push of warm muscle or skin, no lingering eye of alluring encouragement, nothing described except the hands at the ends of my arms and the face that spoke my actual function I serve to this world and myself.
The challenge was the everyday, every casual day I fight to maintain my twist between purpose and pleasure, to distinguish between what I need do, versus what I want. The challenge was meeting it. Pushing what other’s valued gently behind me, then finding this diffidence and finally integrity inside out, to represent this mind and its beliefs. This challenge I face in the mirror every morning, to uphold the dignity of a pious woman, giving up my love of trend for my love of intellectual freedom with no obstruction because of the distraction of beauty, is my fight for principle for reason. Then it dawned on me, everything we value is covered from the curious eye of man, from money to CDs to secrets gems and jewels, and they all wear the hijab, all carrying the cost of their beauty with their cover.
This jittered my confidence.
Protect yourself.
Distinguish yourself.
Meet the challenge.
It is the lesson and principle of this initiative from the hijab that now applies to most everything I do, which contributes this sense of individual serene confidence usefulness purpose and spirit. Getting me past the methods trends and fashions of norm and chiefly into my intellectual expansion.
Yes, not a day sets off without introducing its temptations to slink back to what used to be, but my self-sacrifice of beauty for my dream to achieve great moral and mind, I am finding my self-reliance gratitude and satisfaction renewed. With this mind set I am the walking learning example of where I need to be, which turned out to be my want all along. Mind over matter. Protect yourself. Distinguish yourself. Meet the challenge.
No comments:
Post a Comment